Sunday Funny
Submitted by mminnoe on October 4, 2009 - 10:10am
Tinkle
A woman pregnant with triplets was walking down the street when a
masked robber ran out of a bank and shot her three times in the
stomach.
Luckily the babies were OK. The surgeon decided to leave the bullets
in because it was too risky to operate.
She gave birth to two healthy daughters and a healthy son.
All was fine for 16 years, and then one daughter walked into the room in tears.
'What's wrong?' asked the mother. 'I was taking a tinkle and this
bullet came out,' replied the daughter.
The mother told her it was okay and explained what happened 16 years ago.
About a week later the second daughter walked into the room in tears.
'Mom, I was taking a tinkle and this bullet came out.'
Again the mother told her not to worry and explained what happened 16 years ago.
A week later her son walked into the room in tears. 'It's okay' said
the Mom, 'I know what happened You were taking a tinkle and a bullet
came out.'
'No,' said the boy, 'I was playing with myself and I shot the dog.'
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......forgive me for postitioning a Wednesday funny here.........but apparantly "Fido" can make you a little money in Taiwan.............and to think of all that wasted "dog product" that we left in burning paper bags on people's porches........................$3 for 2 lbs?.............I wonder how long that would take my dog to pay the rent.......
.
Wed Oct 7, 3:33 am ET
TAIPEI (AFP) – Taiwanese authorities said Wednesday they are encouraging the public to pick up garbage, including dog excrement, for rewards in the first move of its kind to clean up the environment.
The Environmental Protection Bureau in central Taichung City said it is offering a gift voucher of 100 Taiwan dollars (three dollars) for one kilogram (two pounds) of dog excrement.
To collect vouchers, citizens must haul the canine droppings and other garbage to specified locations, the bureau said.
"We hope the people will help clean up and conserve the environment so we can have a clean city by offering the rewards," it said in a statement.
The bureau is also giving vouchers for picking up plastic, paper and Styrofoam cups as well as plastic bags.
eldoggg
....is this the same guy who pretended to take issue with mminoe's abbreviations?.........text?..........ROFLMAO.............maybe he iS telling the truth that he DID lie....... ha ha ha.....
1)
#1 posted by Doran
"we have chosen hope over fear"
#2 posted by mountynbyker , January 20, 2009 6:28 PM
Oh my, Xeni, shouldn't this, "I suspect the next four years won't quite live up to the massive, collective, candy-colored orgasm of hope we experienced today.", look more like this:
sspct th nxt fr yrs wn't qt lv p t th mssv, cllctv, cndy-clrd rgsm f hp w xprncd tdy. ????
2)
#1 posted by mountynbyker , January 20, 2009 5:05 PM
Srsly, bngbng, whn r y gng t chng th nm t brckbrck?
...
..
eldoggg
........well I have to admit the "Sabbath Day" joke started off a little dubious.........or is it "dubiously?"........I want to make sure I have it right......erhh?......I mean correct.......for the crotchety old phogeys......or is it "fogeys?".............aughhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.................IT'S TOO MUCH PRESSURE !!!........ I can't take it .........but it was funny in the end......or is it "funny AT the end?"...............let's try this for a minute and see if deuschbag was right.............(can we SAY deuschbag on here?).............this ought to REALLY send someone into orbit...... ha ha.......
Dear Mminoe ,
In regard to the aforementioned attempt at humor , sometimes referred to as a joke , I have to say
I was mildly offended at the reference to a pregnant woman being shot. I would like to remind you that
is a "Sunday Funny" , not a "Saturday Night Funny". I would like to say that your spelling , grammar and
letter form was perfect however. It is obvious that you are an educated man by your writing style , and for
me that makes the joke much funnier. I was able to overlook the last reference to masturbation at the
punchline and actually laugh for a change . I'm afraid it DID cause me to "break wind" though . My dog has
now left the room , so I must go find him . I , for one , missed your "Sunday Funny" LAST week and am
glad you posted one today . You'll HAVE to excuse me for now because I'm feeling a little constipated
today whilst I write .
Respectfully yours ,
analdoggg
eldoggg
.........well I found this to be funny this Sunday..........life is stranger than fiction...........
...........erh?..........that's not gonna be good for the relationship...........
PONTIAC, Mich. – A Detroit man has been sentenced to at least two years in prison for stealing a woman's car after skipping out on the check during their first date. Twenty-four-year-old Terrance McCoy was sentenced Friday in Oakland County Circuit Court to two to 10 years in prison.
McCoy pleaded no contest Sept. 18 to unlawfully driving away a vehicle. A no-contest plea is not an admission of guilt but is treated as a conviction at sentencing.
Police say McCoy dined with the 27-year-old Southfield woman on April 24 at a restaurant in Ferndale. The woman told investigators McCoy said he forgot his wallet in her car and asked for the keys. Police say McCoy then took off in the car.
Defense attorney Terri Antisdale says McCoy is a "very nice man who made a bad decision."
.................but you GOTTA love the spin the defense attorney put on his client............" a VERY nice man?".......................ROFLMAO..................who has THAT attorney been hanging out with?............ ha ha ha..........
eldoggg