Is it snooping or being a mom?

I've never blogged before, but I just can't resist giving my opinion on the matter of children and snooping. NO, it isn't snooping, it's being a parent. Maybe instead of making them put you as a friend, get some software, keylogging software, and use it. Kids are smart. They could have more than one account, one that you see, and one you dont.
 I live fairly remote, and my daughter was online alot one summer, and i thought it was good for her to socialize with the computer, there aren't many teens here, but here what happened...please copy and paste this link to your browser's address.
http://www.dentistry-forums.com/many-people-give-up-computer-after-probs-off-topic-t1248.html
 Consequently, this all ended up with a "probable cause of abuse and neglect" with Mo. social services, although she was in therapy. I never even saw the investigater in person. tried to appeal, to no avail. Make it somewhat impossible to get a jop. Remember, whatever your kid does is your crime...
 

I absolutely insist that I'm their friends for Myspace of Facebook. I also check it everyday and look to see what comments are made. If there's nothing that I consider bad on it, I don't say anything. If there is something that shouldn't be up there, I make him take it down.
I haven't resorted to a keylogger yet, I haven't looked at the facebook IM yet to see if it keeps logs of conversations, but I know myspace's IM does.

First let me give you a link to common "lingo" teens use through text and IMing these days.
www.teenchatdecoder.com/internet-safety-articles/top-teen-acronyms.htm
Here is some helpful infoMost social networks have age requirements out of the gate for membership, obviously this doesn't matter to people who lie, but it does help to use that as perhaps the gateway to a talk about netiquette and internet safety.I believe myspace is 15. Facebook is 13. Check the faqs and guidelines together, see how eager they are to allow you to take a look, ask "Can I see your layout?" or "what family pics do you have up?" That will normally indicate how comfortable your kids are for you to see their pages.
Now I work online for my business, as does my husband, so we just naturally grew into computer with our kids, and led by example, how to use passwords, and never using our real names in user names, no matter how safe you think you are. (Like here for example.) All the settings are set for privacy, and the kids understand, because we build websites and get them ranked, that the minute you load something, you lose your rights over it, when google caches it, and images grabs it, it's online forever, and anyone can deface it, spread it, violate it.
www.safeteens.com/kids-pledge/ If your children love responsibility a good way to help them focus on the information and the talks is to have them sign a contract, you can find them online or write it yourself. Our kids (the older ones) have had online social accounts for a few years, but they have always been linked to ours, that's a rule. We also use our email for theirs, so updates,information or account settings notify an email we share, if you'd like to give them the illusion of more privacy, you can set up their email but have copies sent to yours as well.
We have no computers in bedrooms here, and no phones for the older kids to be able to get online with.We have laptops for work, and we share one family computer in the family room, so the illusion of privacy has never been precedent, they know we're always aware and around.
Best bet, get involved, join the sites they're on, learn how to use them, play along, learn from them as you set an example of responsible behaviour.I personally believe, the trick to all the technology at their fingertips, is moderation, supervision and education. The tool is awesome and wondrous, and forever changed our lives, and there is so much information, and knowledge and self learning on the internet. You can travel anywhere in the world, meet people all over the world, and be a world citizen.The trick is to not allow the social aspect to be the biggest part of their online experience.

Moms need all the help they can get to keep children safe. Also I went to a rally in the park with Moms ( Mothers Outraged at Molesters) the number is 478-2355 or www.momskc.org They pass out a handbook because your best defense is knowledge. In the book they have a family contract for online safety. I have a dear friend who worked in law enforcement busting all the bad bad cases in KC. We all need to be on the look out for child predators online we have a ton of them. It's hard to be a Mom at times cause we have to stand our ground and do things we do not like to do but thats what it takes to stay safe. Much Love and Prayers cause we all need it. xox 

yes check it regulary, and use a keylogger if needs be if you feel they are hiding things from you go with your gut. I have three girls and watch very carefully. Maybe it's just I know they are kids and are easly influenced. Being open is probally the most important part. And knowing parents and where they stand and what they allow there kids to do, all that stuff helps. There is a hell of alot that goes on, and that most parents have no idea, my kids tell me almost everything and Im glad to be there if they need me.

Normal
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U know what Judge Judy says almost once a week?
It is very simple to tell if a teenager is lying?
If their lips move when they speak……
I think that was old school, add in the internet and you can go to the nth factor.
Most of the my friends with teens and pre-teens are in a mess with phones and web sites  and it’s a constant problem…